Grassy munchies all. I have news – a new name and a new problem.

I am now known as Hench Wench Thunder Feet and, my human has been harassing me with an alarming ‘puff puff’ sound.

My new badge of honour is quite a mouthful so I’m happy to stick with Frankie still. Or, just Thunder for short.

My interpretation of this is ‘She Who is Fast and Strong’. Kat said it was because I was ‘built like a tank’ and ‘the ground shakes as my hooves pound over it at full pelt’.

Good job I can happily disregard my human.

I’ve also had more of the horrible hay-fever which has turned into Asthma, meaning I can’t breath as well as I should be able to. Kat said I need to start using something call an inhaler.

I am deeply suspicious of the ‘puff puff’ sound the inhaler makes and there is little this side of The Bridge that could convince me otherwise.

Kat even tried to tempt me with the Hobnob – literally my favourite thing about humans – but it wasn’t enough to entice me. In-fact, it was almost enough to put me off these crunchy oaty delights for life – an unforgivable travesty that would have been.

The ‘puff puff’ must be important as Kat has sought a higher authority – the man that can talk horse. Why she thinks I will ever be talked into liking something that sounds like a snake going in for the killer bite is way beyond my extreme hairiness.

They think I don’t know, but once I’m able to tolerate the ‘puff puff’ near me, they are going to ‘puff puff’ it up my nose – 5 times a day. I’ve never heard such nonsense. Game on humans.

While Kat is plotting and scheming with the ‘puff puff’, I’ve got the same medicine to take in my grassy munchies feed instead. Apparently, it’s something called Steroids, which is working wonders.

I think it’s probably what’s earned me my new title – my turn of hoof to full velocity the other day nearly sent Kat catapulting over my head.

That’s definitely something to keep up my hairy feathers if she continues with the ‘puff puff’ abuse. Tit for tat and all.

Until next time.

GMFN

F x (HWTF)