The male human that can talk Horse visited recently. He told Kat I wasn’t gooey enough on the inside and we need to work on improving my goo factor.

Now, he’s not making much sense here in Horse or Human language, so I’d better explain.

Gooey means soft. There is no question about my softness on the outside with my wonderful abundance of silky hair. When it comes to Kat and humans though apparently, I’m lacking softness on the inside.

Softness on the inside of a horse is a wonderful mix of calm and total trust with our human. We are happy to offer all of ourselves willingly without any resistance. When both horse and human are soft together true magic can be achieved. It’s an overwhelming feeling of pure connection and peace for both.

This is what Ross, the horse talker, means with gooey on the inside.

I’m not completely sure why I’m not gooey on the inside. I think it’s because I’ve never had a human listen to me before or ask my permission to do things with me.

I usually go along with what humans ask of me anyway as that’s the kind of good-natured, stoic Cob I am. It would be nice to be asked sometimes though. Plus, the difference of going along with things grudgingly or gooily is huge.

Kat and Echo were a big gooey puddle together. Ross thinks Kat perhaps isn’t gooey enough with me either because she’s still missing Echo too much and not giving me all of herself.

To help increase my goo factor Ross is teaching Kat to speak and understand Horse. She should then know if I’m ready and relaxed enough to do what she’s asking and if I’m doing it gooily instead of grudgingly.

If she can help me improve my goo, perhaps hers will as well.

For my first lesson I had to follow Ross and Kat by reading their body language. Ross spoke clear Horse so that was easy whereas Kat just mumbled and was a bit rubbish. I think Ross will sort her out though.

My only concern with this plan is they are cutting out my treats so they know I’m not faking gooeyness for the sake of a few hay cobs, (to be fair, I would do this).

I am however 6 now, so I’ve decided to be very grown up and work with them to try and increase my goo factor.

Back-up plan though if all fails is obviously the faking it.

GMFN

F x

A man visited me recently with Kat. He’s called Ross and he can talk Horse.

It’s a blessed relief to be honest as Kat can’t. Well, not my version of Horse. I speak Pure Horse.

Pure Horse is the subtle body language that only horses, other prey animals and a handful of humans can speak and understand.

The wrinkling of a nose or the twitch of an ear is as clear as day to us, but way too understated for many other species, including humans.

Infact, the whole purpose of Pure Horse is that predators can’t understand us. No real surprise humans struggle.

Echo told me Pure Horse was no good with Kat so she used a more direct, simple version called Beginner Horse. This version gives clearer signals including affection for getting things right and unadulterated fury for getting them wrong. She said it worked a treat with Kat.

I don’t think there’s a picture of her getting it wrong – she was probably too occupied with running away.

Anyway, turns out Ross is going to help me and Kat understand each other better. I can already understand Human so he’s going to teach her Pure Horse. Hurrah, I’ll finally get to tell her all my gripes.

The body language of people is what we horses call Human. Horses understand Human completely. Unfortunately most humans seem to have no idea what their body is saying – to us or each other.

Learning Pure Horse would help humans not only understand our subtle body language but also their own.

If a human’s body language is tense we will be tense. If a human’s body language is soft and relaxed, we will be. You could call us an emotional mirror.

Apparently, this is why we are sometimes used for therapy – to help troubled humans understand what they are feeling.

We horses really are the gift that just keeps on giving aren’t we!

Perhaps there should be a National Horse Appreciation week. When Kat can understand Pure Horse I’ll suggest it.

In the meantime, she’s got some work to do…

GMFN

Fx